Dear [Your Name Here],
Please accept my sincere apologies for not [(Choose One or More:) posting an entry on my blog, responding to your comment on my blog, visiting your blog, commenting on your blog, sending you an email, replying to your email, calling you, returning your phone call, mailing that letter/note/package I’ve been meaning to mail you]. I’ve been involved in a battle with the Universe of late, and it seems the Universe is winning. In the last week and a half I’ve dealt with two sick children, one child having problems in school, two trips to [larger town an hour away, where we go for shopping and pediatrician appointments], with another trip (an appointment with Miss Attitude’s pediatric pulmonologist) scheduled for tomorrow. I’ve missed two full days and two half days of work (and pay), which has put me three full days behind during my busiest time of the work month. In the midst of the chaos, I’ve also been trying to adjust to the change in my medication; planning and preparing for The Drama Queen’s birthday party, scheduled for next weekend; helping The Drama Queen with her Math Project; and desperately missing my car, my dear, sweet Suburban, as she sits PARKED beside the house, looking lonely and forlorn, until we can figure out where the hell we’re gonna get $1200-1500 to get her a new rear end.
So, [Your Name Here], I humbly ask your forgiveness for being such a terrible [(Choose one or more:)blogger/friend/wife/mother/daughter/daughter-in-law/granddaughter/sister/sister-in-law/blogfriend/faceless online acquaintance]. I’ll be sure to pencil in my public flogging in the next available space on my schedule. How does 17 years from now work for you?