Imaginary Superstar

Drama Queen: Mom, when I’m fifteen, will you buy me an air guitar?

LadyBug: Will I buy you a what?

DQ: Will you buy me an air guitar?

LB: Do you know what an air guitar is?

DQ: Yeah, it’s like a rock guitar.

LB: Nope……You already have an air guitar. Here, I’ll show you. Hold your left hand up like this. [Holding left hand out to the side.] Now hold your right hand in front of your belly, like this. [Right hand poised at “guitar” level.] Now move your right hand like this. [Simulating “strumming” of guitar.] That’s an air guitar. When you pretend to play a guitar, you’re playing an air guitar.

Miss Attitude: [Has been paying close attention and following instructions.] So…an air guitar is a guitar……made of air!

LB: Exactly.

DQ: [Is not nearly as amused or interested as Miss Attitude.] Well, I want a rock star guitar.

LB: [Mentally calculating how much money these kids are gonna end up costing me. They’re bleeding me dry, I tell ya.]


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